Well I know I as a woman I have faked an orgasm. I reckon at some point in our lives most of us ladies have faked an orgasm. It is now believed that it is possible as many as one in three women is unable to achieve orgasm with their partner.

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I had an email from a lovely lady Rachael who was looking for some advice on how she could attain consistent orgasms from sexual experiences with her husband. She wrote:-

“When it comes to orgasms I have to use all my acting skills. I don’t try to be a porno star and overplay my hand. All I do is clench my muscles, hold my breath and quiver, then relax and smile”.

Yeh me too! I know exactly where Rachael is coming from and I expect that most of my readers have been in this position too. Rachael charade is not unusual. I have reported on this website surveys have shown that anywhere between 48 and 72 percent of women has faked orgasms. Rachael went on to explain in her email that in every other area of her relationship she was completely transparent with her husband.

I always advocate conversation between partners is paramount to a fulfilling sexual relationship and that Rachael in her lets say “performances” has in fact been lying to her husband. Yes it maybe shocking but it is true to say to perform in this way is to be deceitful to your husband or partner.

Now it is I guess OK to fake every now and again. Call them small white lies but if you are consistently faking an orgasm then I believe there is a problem. To fake when maybe you’re tired or just want to end sex and don’t want to let the partner down doesn’t harm the relationship.

The problem is habitual faking. I know when a women fakes an orgasm she is doing it for some one else. The thing is if you turn that on its head and think about it; then as a woman you are not faking an orgasm to make yourself happy. If you are faking all you are doing is smoothing over the cracks in your sexual life. In effect by faking you are just caressing the ego of a lover into thinking they are satisfying you sexually.

The reasoning behind why we fake it maybe due to our narrow view of sexuality and that the right way to have sex must end with a screaming orgasm. It is unsurprising that we’d rather fake than strive within restrictive parameters towards such an uncertain end.

It is habitual faking that is counter productive. It is when women who are faking all the time or very frequently because they feel under pressure to please a partner or because they themselves are reaching orgasm rarely or not at all. This situation is then made even worse because these women don’t know how to say what they want to improve things sexually.

Why Do Women Fake Orgasms?

I believe women who habitually fake are probably suffering from low sexual self-esteem and have an eroded sense of entitlement to sexual gratification. These women don’t believe they can ask their partner to help them orgasm because they would feel greedy or selfish. This is true of many women; a woman could be a strident feminist in her professional life but a lot less confident sexually. They fake and lie because they don’t feel they can ask for what they want.

It is also true to say that men may fake too. Yes I have many men also visit my website and even though a man may ejaculate he may not orgasm. Ejaculation is the functional part of sex; the propulsion of seminal fluid. The orgasm is the climactic feeling in sex.

It doesn’t matter on the gender habitual faking as opposed to occasional faking is corrosive to emotional intimacy. If the faking continues it may lead to the person who has been faking becoming resentful to their partner. They may feel bad about themselves which in turn will put strain or bring conflict to the relationship.

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Remember to visit my site next week to get the next installment on faking orgasms and find out how to move past faking and have better sexual experiences.

The easiest way is to join my newsletter group if you haven't already simply fill the webform in below to get the latst updates.

Tags: sexual fanatazing, womens orgasm, sexual experiences, women faking orgasms, faked an orgasm, female orgasm

There are several types of orgasm for ladies. Most females can reach orgasm through stimulation of the clitoris with the fingers, oral sex or a sex toy such as a the dildo or vibrator.

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The first type of orgasm to explain is the one most people associate with women the vaginal orgasm. The easiest way most women achieve a vaginal orgasm is through G-Spot stimulation. The G-spot is a spongy mass of tissue that swells (engorges with blood) when excited. It's still hard to find for many women. It is however discovered two inches within the vagina on the front wall. It is known that by stimulating the G-Spot for vaginal orgasms leads to a much more powerful orgasmic experience.

The second type of orgasm is the blended orgasm which is a mix of clitoral and G-Spot stimulation. They are known to be powerful orgasms that can produce intense orgasms and also lead to female ejaculation.

Multiple orgasms are a series of orgasms that occur over a brief period of time and they can occur with any kind of orgasm. With multiple orgasms after the first orgasm women will have sequential climaxes. Multiple orgasms can be continuous without further stimulation or stimulation necessary for some women to continue to orgasm.

A simultaneous orgasm is when a lovers climax at the same time. This can be a fantastic experience, though doubtless not something you mean to do each time you make love, a lot of the enjoyment of the orgasm is watching your other half have one.

The brain is the largest sex organ, and due to this, some folks can reach climax without sexual stimulation. These orgasms are achieved through a woman having erotic thoughts without stimulation until reaching orgasm.

Nocturnal orgasms or wet dreams are another type prompted by the brain whilst sleeping and most associated with boys going through puberty (put in as technically another type of orgasm).

An extended orgasm is a solitary orgasm that sustains pleasurable sensations of climax over a long than usual period of time. The duration of the orgasm can be developed over time and then can last an hour or longer.

Orgasms are felt in the body, mind, emotions and spirit. The goal of gaining orgasm is to feel the greatest amount of that pleasure as possible either on your own or with a partner. They are mainly through stimulation of erotic zones but it is important to remember the mind needs to be stimulated to really make the most of your sexual encounters and therefore your eventual orgasm.

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Tags: simultaneuos orgasm, woman orgasm, orgasm, extended orgasm, multiple orgasm, types of orgasm

Some girls feel that one is sufficient and others find that their clitoris is too sensitive after their first orgasm and their just not interested in having any more. Girls unlike men on do not have a refractory period, after their first orgasm they are in the plateau stage and stay aroused for longer and if stimulation is continued more orgasms are likely. These appear as a sequence of climaxes that come close along without an interruption in arousal. For some women they may need some seconds to relax before stimulation can continue when having multiple orgasms but then an another orgasm usually occurs inside minutes.

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A likely situation for this to occur is if the clitoris is stimulated manually or orally till climax is reached, followed by another climax during intercourse.

Some girls might find that their clitoris is extraordinarily sensitive after their first orgasm.

If direct stimulation is too intense, try indirect stimulation on another part of the genitals. It would help to take deep breaths, rocking your pelvis in time with your breathing, while the energy builds up again in your genitals. Within a few minutes you could find that over stimulation will give way to pleasure. There are two types of multiple orgasms.

Sequential Multiples

These are a series of climaxes that come close together with an interruption in arousal. The woman might need a few seconds to relax and then stimulation can continue, with another orgasm occurring within minutes. A likely situation for this to happen is if the clitoris is stimulated manually or orally until climax is reached, followed by another climax during intercourse.

Some women might find that their clitoris is very sensitive after their first orgasm. If direct stimulation is too intense, try indirect stimulation on another part of the genitals. It might help to take deep breaths, rocking your pelvis in time with your breathing, while the energy builds up again in your genitals. Within a few minutes you could find that over stimulation will give way to pleasure.

Serial Multiples

These are orgasms that come one after the other without interruption in arousal. These are only seconds apart and may feel like on continuous orgasm with multiple peak points. This is likely to be achieved if the clitoris and G-Spot are being stimulated simultaneously.

Some women find that their second or third orgasms are more powerful than the first, and some find that their orgasms become progressively less intense.

In conclusion

Achieving multiple orgasms can be refreshing, exciting and even lead to an overall sense if well being for a long while after the event. A great way to get multiple orgasm is of course through self pleasure.

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Tags: clitoris, orgasm, female masturbation, masturbation, female orgasm, self pleasure

Imagine or visualize energy streaming out of your nipples. Allow your breasts and heart to open and flow as you hum. Transfer some herbal oil or ointment to your palms. Place them on either side of one breast and hum. Cup your fingers alongside or under your breast, thumbs touching and up as high on the chest as possible. (If your breasts are very large, rest the right breast in the right palm and massage with the left thumb, starting in the armpit and moving toward the centre of the chest.)

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Press in and slide your thumbs down toward the nipple, pressing the breast tissue into your fingers and palms. Stretch your thumbs up toward the collarbone again, but slightly farther apart, press in and slide down. Continue until your thumbs are as far apart as possible (the middle of your chest and your armpit). Repeat, gradually increasing pressure, but only as long as it feels good.

Caution: There is a slight possibility of spreading breast cancer through vigorous massage, rough handling, or very deep pressure.

Transfer more oil or ointment to your palms and rub your hands together. Repeat the previous pattern, but break up the stroke: Instead of a long, slow, smooth stroke, use your thumbs to make a lot of overlapping short strokes, gradually moving down the chest. Raise the arm of the breast you're massaging, and put your hand behind you or on your head. If your breast leans to the outside, prop a pillow under that shoulder or lean over.

Dip your fingers into your oil or ointment and, starting in your armpit, press the finger pads of your first two or three fingers down with enough pressure to hold the skin, and make a small circle. Keep making little circles (with enough pressure to feel the underlying structures) as you trace an imaginary spiral from your armpit around and around your breast, growing ever smaller until you reach your nipple. (If it is difficult or impossible for you to use your finger pads, use your palm.) Cover your breast with your hand and hum. Curl your fingers into your armpit and gently grasp the ridge of lymph-rich tissues and muscles that extend from the shoulder down into the breast.

Move up and down this ridge several times, using small squeezes or long glides or little spirals or your own strokes. As you touch your breasts, imagine or visualize your fingertips emitting healing pink sparkles that embrace and nourish your breasts. Allow any held distress to be soothed by the balm of the infused herbal oil/ointment. Let overactive energy be calmed by the rhythm of your fingers circling, circling, spiralling, spiralling. Apply more oil or ointment with your finger pads, making large gliding circles from mid-chest to under your breast, up toward the armpit and over and around, again and again, with a steady rhythm.

Call to your Wise Healer Within as you hum. Massage your other breast, starting from the beginning: Put your hands over your heart. (Is there a difference between the breast that has already been massaged and the one that hasn't yet?) Rub your oily hands briskly together; hold either side of your breast and hum. Extend your thumbs and massage as before, including all of the previous strokes and ending with your eyes closed, relaxing deeply and allowing yourself to contact and listen to your Wise Healer Within.

After You Breast Massage

After your breast self-massage, take a moment to record your experience. This will help you learn more quickly what's normal for you. You can draw a map of your breasts to help you remember what you've felt. Write down any messages offered to you by your breasts or your Wise Healer Within. If you like, make up a little song to hum during your massage.

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Tags: breasts, female orgasm, clitoris, breast massage, self pleasure for women, self love, orgasm, female masturbation, nipples, g-spot

Breast self-massage helps prevent cancer as well as detect it. Breast self-massage is a way to be intimate with your breasts. Breast self-massage is a piece of women's wisdom. Many of the women I've talked with say they don't do breast self-exams, though most think they ought to. Many women don’t want to look for or heaven forbid, find cancer.

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We've been trained to avoid danger, and looking for cancer sounds like looking for trouble. Our bodies are influenced by what we think, so how can it be safe to spend time every month doing a breast self-exam, worrying if we're about to find a lump? But we feel guilty when we don't.

And what are we supposed to feel when we touch our breasts anyway? They feel full of lumps. Most of us aren't sure how to touch or examine our breasts or what we'd do if we did feel something truly suspicious.

Breast self-massage offers a way to let go of this tension and also to get in touch with yourself. A soothing, nurturing self-massage is a pleasurable and relaxing way to get to know your breasts. It avoids the worry of checking for cancer; while providing an excellent early-warning system should cancer arise. Regular, loving touching of our breasts allows us to recognize normal breast changes without fear, and gives us time to respond thoughtfully to abnormal changes. Breast self-massage is also a quiet, focused time that allows the Wise Healer Within to alert us to any changes that require our attention. Infused (not essential) herbal oils are an important element of breast self-massage.

When herbs are infused into oil, active plant components are liberated and can be massaged into breast tissue – where they help reverse abnormal cellular changes such as hyperplasia, atypia, pre-cancers, and in situ cancers. It’s fast and fun to make your own infused oils or you can buy them. If this is all new to you, take a few months to learn about your breasts with self-massage before doing breast self-exam.

They complement each other: Let the pleasure of the massage infuse the exam, and let the effectiveness of the exam inform the massage.

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[tags]self pleasure,self pleasure for women,female self pleasure,masturbation, female masturbation,self love,clitoris,orgasm,female orgasm,g-spot,nipples,breast,breast massage[tags]

Well ladies the financial crisis has been far reaching and has really started to hit a majority of my friends. Well a little tongue in cheek but at selfplasureforwomen.com we have few ideas on how we girls can help ourselves and make the current predicament a little easier to bear.

Everyone has a little less money in their pocket as prices keep rising as the oil prices fluctuate. Us girls cannot afford to go out as much as we used to which means we are at home a lot more. The problem is how can we fill some of the time we now have on our hands either if we live by ourselves or with a partner.

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Ladies the solution is at hand literality the clue is in our website name. Yes girls it is time to get more enjoyment from ourselves. Hell getting an orgasm is about the most fun we lasses can get and it is free. This can be achieved by ourselves or with a partner.

I believe this is a great time to explore your body and learn how to get the most pleasure possible from it. An ideal way to really get the most satisfaction is with the help of a good toy.

Ladies getting yourself a good vibrator can be a real investment at this time. Imagine the scenario you have a bit of time on your hands and there isn’t anything on TV and you are wondering what to do. Well it is the perfect time to bring out a toy and have some fun for yourself. A good toy could provide hours of entertainment over several years at for as little as $20.

Girls I have several different toys from nipple claps and several dildo/vibrators which I will be assure you I will be using over the coming months now I will be spending more time at home.

Here ladies are some related articles that that I think might aid you in a decision on whether a toy is the right choice for you. Girls let get going! Oh if you would like some more information or need some advice then please  contact me and I will help in anyway I can. Thanks Holly.

Why We Should All Self Pleasure – A great article that is a good guide to start with when thinking about self pleasure.

Which and How Many Women Self Pleasure – This article lets you know how many women masturbate.

How to Choose the Right Dildo – An easy to use guide to help you choose the perfect dildo for you.

How to Use A Dildo – An easy guide to start you getting off.

World’d Top Three Most Powerful Vibrators – A lot of ladies asked for this info so I went and go it for you.

Jenna’s Ultimate Rotating G-Spot Vibrator – This is my favourite toy at the moment.

Nipple and Breast Play – Learn to love other parts of your body.

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The dildo is an object that should be talked about much more openly as it can have a great many benefits to the both the individual and the couple. Love aids come in all shapes and sizes and it maybe hard to choose which one works for whoever is concerned.

Setting aside though for a moment the wealth of choice when purchasing a dildo we should explore why purchasing a sex toy is a good idea.

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A dildo can be used in many ways as it can be used to stimulate both partners in the couple through gentle use of pressure/insertion on different parts of the anatomy. Irrespective of which type of self-love is involved the act of masturbation allows an individual to explore by themselves what they like and how they like it. When a person is self pleasuring they are in a comfortable setting and often have the time to explore their own body. Using a dildo is an extension of this with a woman for example being able to learn how to get reach different types of orgasm. Through gentle exploration and with time a woman can learn all aspects of what allows her to climax with the most pleasure.

This then can be relayed to a partner who then can use that information to then make sure that the needs of the partner are met which leads to better love-making all-round with everybody happy.

Speaking of couples it is also true that the exploration doesn’t have to be done alone. Dildos can be used as part foreplay or aid sex to allow both couples to get the most from the love-making process.

A couple who slowly want to be come aroused could use the gentle vibrations of a silicone dildo that feels great and also keeps body heat to stimulate one another. On a sensitive part of the body a love aid allows the partner to very gently excite the area without applying to much pressure.

The use of a dildo in love making can take the pressure of a man to perform all the time and he can still satisfy his partner whilst both couples can have fun. Dildos are great for both self-pleasure and also as an aid to sex and should be part of any couples sex life. Yes dildos can benefit a couple’s sex life.

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The first step in understanding Hysteria is to understand where the word came from. Hysteria is derived from an ancient Greek word, 'hystera', which means uterus.

So the uterus is the center of this disease, its origins if you will. But why the uterus? The uterus has a long and unhappy history of being thought of as evil, as being the area of the woman's body that causes sickness, mental instability and craziness.

Hysteria turned out to be a great diagnosis for doctors to give their female patients. Since hysteria was caused by the uterus and everybody knew how unstable and weak women were, every illness that wasn't understood could be called Hysteria.

It all comes back to the uterus and the lack of understanding of how the female reproductive system worked. But there was a definite trend of who tended to suffer from Hysteria, this included virgins, nuns, widows and the occasional housewife. But why? What do these women have in common?

Sex, or a lack thereof. Women were considered unstable and weak and a lack of "hysterical paroxysm", or as we tend to refer to it, orgasm, could cause them to enter a crazed state.

Since masturbation was a very terrible thing to do there were doctors who would help women who suffered from Hysteria. In order to do this they would provide women with pelvic massages, manually inducing hysterical paroxysm.

But there was one problem with this method of treatment, sometimes it could take hours to achieve the desired result. And with such a long treatment time doctors were unable to treat many patients in a day, creating a lack of income. One way doctors tried to speed things along in the mid to late 1800's was through the use of water hoses, creating a water massage.

But thankfully in 1873 a new tool was created and first used in an asylum in France to treat Hysteria. This tool was called a electromechanical vibrator. This wondrous tool allowed doctors to help their patients in a matter of minutes, not hours.

As technology advanced more and more people got electricity in their houses, allowing women to treat themselves in the comfort of their own home. Sears even advertised their vibrators in their 1918 catalogue where they said their vibrators were ”Very useful and satisfactory for home service.”

And so vibrators became much more common place, women could use vibrators at home, which was not masturbating, since it was all in the name of keeping them healthy and sane.

But nowadays there is no such illness as Hysteria so women can't say their vibrators such as bullet vibrators are used for their mental health. But luckily they don't need to.

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Dharani has no end to her talents and she has also written a great self pleasure story for us. It is fabulous and I really enjoyed. Thanks again Dharani. Read more of Dharani’s Articles here. Like Dharani’s work feel you could contribute too? Then contact Holly and let hundreds of other see you work.

I hear the train a coming….

I was on the overnight train to Ankara and the movement of the train was turning me on because the seam from the crotch of my Levis had worked its way under the crotch of my panties, over one of my pussy lips, finally resting on the side of my clit and up to my bum hole. If I moved a certain way, the seam would tighten up along the side of my clit and bum hole, sending shivers down my spine.

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Finally, I couldn’t take the tension any longer. I needed the release, to come, but I was in a train car late at night with a few other sleepy people. I tried squirming to reposition the seam on top of my throbbing clit to make it happen on its own, but I only succeeded in hurting myself.

I was wearing a large woollen poncho, so using it like a blanket; I lay down on my left side on the seat pretending to try to sleep. Then I put my right arm down across my chest, slipped my right hand down the front of my jeans. I gently pried the seam away from the side of my suffering clit.

Next, I slightly parted my pussy lips, and very lightly laid my index finger along the top of my hard clit. It was dry from rubbing on the seam of my jeans, the clit hood had been pushed back exposing the head which was dry and sore from direct exposure to the hard seam.

Without any motion from my hand, I slipped my fingertip quickly into my wet pussy, scooped up some slick moisture and gently washed it over my suffering clit to ease the chaffing.

Out of fear from being caught, I kept my index finger resting motionless on top of the shaft of my now throbbing clit, gently cupping the tip with a wet, curled fingertip. Barely touching the hard clit head, I let the rhythm and movement from the old train move my fingertip at will. Giving control of my pleasure over to the movements of the train only heightened the excitement. I prayed for every thump, bump and sway from the rails!

Because I couldn’t work my hand without being caught, as I grew more and more aroused, all I could do was gently press the heel of my hand into my mound, while pressing down with the top joint of my index finger that rested at the top of my clit shaft. This slightly raised my entire clit up closer to my index fingertip that was gently hovering over my now throbbing clit head.

Every so often I would allow my fingertip to lightly touch my little pee-hole to add to the tension or give a brief, light, passing massage to the exposed head of my clit. The waves of pleasure came over me in electric shocks. I fought the urge to finger myself in earnest.

I was lying on my left side with my left hand now under my sweatshirt lightly flicking a nipple. I have large, thick nipples – like pink #2 pencil erasers. It always feels electric when both my nipples and clitoris are stimulated at the same time.

With a series of bumps from going over a stretch of rough tracks, I finally allowed my finger tip to rapidly but firmly massage my exposed clit head, while the length of my index finger bore down on the shaft, heel of my hand into the roots of my clit in my mound. I swear if ever I squirted it was then. I had to struggle to keep composed as I convulsed in my solitary ecstasy.

My hand was soaked as I discretely pulled it out of my jeans and tried to wipe it off on the front of my sweatshirt under the poncho. I fell asleep with my hand on my breast and woke up about half an hour later in Ankara. Had I not came when I did, I would have been in quite an agitated state upon my arrival – that’s for sure!

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What can self pleasure say but thank you Dharani who finishes her series of best sex toy ideas with three great sex toy ideas. Enjoy ladies! Read more of Dharani’s Articles here.

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Ride ‘em cowgirl!

Missing my sweetheart and in need of a solid man-shag, I went to the bathroom one night, lubed up the side of the bathtub, straddled the wall of the tub on my knees and rode away till I came. It certainly was different. I had to lay over the edge of the tub, using my forearms and the muscles in my thighs to keep my pussy hovered above the cool tub so I could slip and slide and not smash my clit. This increased the intensity when I finally came.  I must remember to try this again soon.    

Child’s Play

I bought one of those soft squishy balls with short feelers all over it. It makes for a great toy when lubed and rubbed on your pussy, nipples, stomach, etc. in bed or soaped up in the shower. I like to hit my hard clit with the feelers; a nice little thrill. Also those soft balloons that are filled with flour and hold their shape when poked are fun to rub yourself into euphoria with.   

Let it roll

Here’s some more kitchen play for those of us who love to bake pies. Get yourself a marble rolling pin for the best pussy pie ever! Put out a towel on the bed, lay out the marble rolling pin and lube it up. Put a knee on either side of the pin, lay out on your tummy spreading open your pussy lips plaster your exposed pussy down on the rolling pin. Go for a ride along the length of the marble pin using your left arm to brace you, your right hand to hold the pin in place at the top, if needed. Again, I like to put mine in the fridge in summer.  

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